Sisältäni Portin Löysin :: I Found a Gate Within Myself

Remembering my dad. Three years ago today he passed on. In his obituary we wrote a verse from a song that was special to him, Sisältäni Portin Löysin by Pekka Streng. Below is an English translation of the lyrics. Pekka Streng was a Finnish progressive rock singer/songwriter who passed away in the 1975, of cancer, when he was 26 years old.

I FOUND A GATE WITHIN MYSELF

I found a gate within myself,

almost unnoticeable.

When I rise through it in silence

I see another world.

I notice the beautiful colors,

I hear the brighter voices.

I leave the chordless caves,

I leave the staggering shadows.

Something radiates and sparkles

even underneath the bleakest shell.

Seeing it, my thoughts

move lighter.

Our colors flow up

and melt together.

Everything touches each other,

everything reaches out for the morning.

SISÄLTÄNI PORTIN LÖYSIN

Sisältäni portin löysin 

melkein huomaamattoman. 

Kun sen läpi hiljaa nousen, 

näen toisin maailman. 

Värit kauniit vasta huomaan, 

kuulen äänet kirkkaammat. 

Jätän soinnuttomat luolat, 

jätän varjot hoippuvat. 

Jokin säteilee ja loistaa 

alta kuoren synkänkin. 

Kun sen huomaa, kevyemmin 

ajatukset liikkuvat. 

Meidän värit ylös virtaa 

ja yhteen sulautuu. 

Kaikki toistaan koskettaa, 

kaikki aamuun kurkottuu.

Remembering My Dad

Today it has been 2 years since my dad passed away. Last night I was watching some old videos of him playing with me and my two younger sisters when we were kids. It was hilarious! But I was balling my eyes out at the same time. I miss him. 

In one of the videos he was holding Kaisu who was maybe 2 years at the time, going through the booklet of a Beatles CD and teaching her the names of the band members. She was trying to get the rolling 'r' down in Ringo, as it's pronounced the Finnish way.

At one of his favorite spots by the lake.

Actually it was my dad who first introduced me to the spiritual books that I have now pretty much dedicated my whole life to - the Vedic wisdom and Krishna books, translated and explained by A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada. All my teens I read a whole lot of books about philosophy, religions, different spiritual processes, new agy psychological stuff, and just tried to figure out the truth. 

One day dad came back from the thrift store and handed me a big stack of beautiful books, all Krishna books. He said, "I thought you might like these as you're into Buddhism and all that." Little did he know :) I found all I was looking for in those books, and so much more that I didn't even realize to look for. And I keep finding new things and seeing new lights all the time as I go on reading and practicing.

One of the last pics of us together.

There are so many reasons I'm grateful for my dad. I'm just sending lots of love today his way, and to my mom and sisters.

Meet My Parents

Continuing the 30 Days posts on set topics.

Day 4 - Your parents


I've always had a very warm and good relationship with my parents. I love them :) They would always support me in everything (except maybe some really dumb stuff). They still do. Of course, my dad passed away last year. But I feel his positive, always supportive and encouraging spirit vividly when I think about him. His name is Kauko, but everyone calls him Kake (pronounced Kah-keh). Since babyhood he instilled in me an everlasting fondness for Bob Dylan, Neil Young, Jimmy Hendrix, The Beatles, Led Zeppelin, Bob Marley, The Ramones, the Woodstock, kindness, Native Americans, the sea, and a lot more, but perhaps most importantly, being your own person. Thank you. 

My mom is Heini. She's so cool. And sweet. The way she dresses is awesome. She's super expert yet insecure cook and makes the best Finnish and Indian and everything-in-between vegetarian food. Simply her cooking makes me miss Finland. Heini jogs and runs and always has many things going on. When she was pregnant with me she would listen to classical music because she heard that such music makes the baby wise. Can't hurt to try right? Thanks mom so much :)

In conclusion, you gotta have pretty kickass parents if one of the first things you ever learnt to speak, in anticipation of dancing in the living room for hours, was: "Soita klokkia tai klekeitä!" which translates to "Play rock or reggae!" [insert funny baby r's]