Dear State Police

Beep, beep!
Beep, beep!

What I bought for breakfast,
the places where I’ve been,
the name of my mother,
it’s all there on your screen.

I’m a straight-edge spiritualist,
peaceful as can be, oh pray
tell why I was flagged so
you’ll detect me two miles away.

Well, little do you know:
I have learnt the science
and microwaved for precisely
five seconds my driver’s license.

You should harass me less,
this should have done the trick.
No beeps and zero privacy, but
one more melted microchip!